Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
