We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
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Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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