I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
