he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I think I just sharted jello shots
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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