I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Randomize
