doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Randomize
