yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize