i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
In other news, I just burned my penis
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
