i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
i want to swaddle you in tequila
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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