grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
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