everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
so let's talk penis.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I'm like, not good at living.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
