You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
