Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Randomize
