The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize