I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
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