We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
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