Moan for me like Helen Keller
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Randomize
