everyone is single if you try hard enough
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize