HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
