Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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