Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
