he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
he thought i was a dude.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Randomize
