everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
