I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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