Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
then he tried to convert me to islam
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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