my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
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