Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
