My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
how drunk are you?
Several
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Randomize
