I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize