And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
i just made my gag reflex go away.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday