best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
