Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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