Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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