I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
Randomize