It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize