yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
