i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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