She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
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