420 ftw
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Randomize
