I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Randomize