Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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