But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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