I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
