wanna go halves on a baby?
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
