PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
