Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
