Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
