so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
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