how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
