so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize